aka DO YOU LIKE HITCHCOCK? (2003) 93 mins RAI ; ITALY

[video - laserdisc - dvd]

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Do you like Hitchcock? You’d better! And his main copier Brian De Palma too if you’re going to get the maximum enjoyment out of Dario Argento’s $2.5 million TV movie, the first of a reputed seven episode series depending on ratings. For like the bag lady character arbitrarily punctuating the action throughout this easy-on-the-eye giallo-lite, Argento rifles through those favoured menace maestros’ back catalogues, and his own, to flesh out a pick-and-mix tribute to their most revered thriller themes.

Looking fabulous thanks to Frederic (Scarlet Diva) Fasano’s pristine photography, it also sounds wonderful due to Pino Donaggio’s melodic score evoking memories of his own Body Double and Ennio Morricone’s breathy Animal Trilogy tunes for Argento. Do You Like Hitchcock? is a fun throwaway, certainly nothing more yet nothing less. It’s 93 minutes of playful murder mayhem that in common with Argento’s recent output starts out incredibly strongly before wending its wayward way to a rather lame conclusion.

It might be as insubstantial as The Card Player but without the shadow of a doubt its far more teasingly entertaining mainly because the buff level kicks in whenever the family plot starts unravelling faster than Elisabetta Rochetti can get her kit off. That ’s the true surprise here; how sexy and gory it is for a TV movie. Written by the usual Argento and Franco Ferrini team, Hitchcock begins with a 1990 forest set prologue establishing the fact juvenile Giulio has an almost pathological voyeuristic streak that continually gets him into trouble. Here it’s spying on two witches about to cast a spell and its presence is felt right up until the final unsettling freeze frame. Shifting to present day Turin, Giulo (an excellent Elio Germano) is now a film student cramming for an exam on the roots of the expressionistic horror film from Nosferatu and The Golem to the classic works of Germany’s Fritz Lang and Britain’s Alfred Hitchcock. In the window facing his apartment he sees his neighbour Sasha (Rocchetti in terrific slut-on-wheels form) posing nude in front of a mirror and can’t tear his eyes away from her naked narcissism.

The next day he meets Sasha in the local video store owned by Andrea (Ivan Morales) as she beats Federica (Chiara Conti playing the typical ice cool Hitchcock blonde) to renting the last DVD of Strangers on a Train. Then Sasha’s mother Renata (Milva Marigliano) is brutally murdered in a marvellous sequence where Argento pulls off a major stylistic coup in complete darkness. Is it just Guilio’s over-active imagination, or have supposed strangers Sasha and Federica entered into a homicide swap pact like the one in the Hitchcock masterpiece?

His girlfriend Arianna (perky Cristina Brondo) thinks he’s crazy, even though it emerges Sasha was left an enormous amount of money in her mother’s will. But if Federica killed Sasha’s mother, whom will Sasha kill in return? Learning Federica is suffering sexual harassment from her boss (Beppe Lo Console), he’s sure the pervert will be her victim. While trailing the couple, Giulio breaks a leg and is confined to his apartment. There his paranoia grows as the murderer closes in to put a stop once and for all to his amateur investigations that are leading to the real truth.

It’s no accident that once past the black magic prologue, the first three things Argento focuses on are the posters for Psycho, Vertigo and Dial M for Murder. Throw in Rear Window and Marnie (all seen in the DVD store along with The Card Player and Scarlet Diva) and the shallow inspirations for this Hitch-cocktail of fiendish bargains, double-cross, MacGuffins and mistaken identity become crystal clear. Over-egging the Euro pudding somewhat, Argento stages the sexual harassment in a wordless montage akin to Brian De Palma’s art gallery sequence in Dressed to Kill.

Not to mention the whole Peeping Tom aspects being more diluted De Palma in Sisters mode than Michael Powell at his most potently subversive. Not wanting to lose out on the homage front, the bathroom attempt on Giulio’s life is a Deep Red shot-for-shot replica. The striking glass encased outside staircase to Sasha ’s flat calls to mind the sliding art gallery ‘aquarium’ doors in The Bird with the Crystal Plumage too. But Do You Like Hitchcock? cannot lose it’s bland TV feel no matter how hard Argento tries to disguise its low-key production values. His direction here is deceptively simple: it takes at least two viewings to realise how mobile the camera actually is because of the lack of over flamboyance. Aside from Renata’s murder and the literal cliffhanging climax, it seems ‘The Italian Hitchcock’ is quite reticent taking on the reputation of the real one in such close comparative quarters. What should have gotten the axe, or been re-shot completely is the moment when Guilio breaks his leg and tries to escape from Federica’s enraged boss. It looked awful in the promo reel used to drum up overseas DVD sales by RAI Trade (and if I told you how much they were asking for the UK rights you wouldn’t believe me!) and it looks ten times worse in narrative context.

More Do You Like Ed Wood Jr?, this will be the laughable turning off point for many although one of the key reveals follows soon after to change the terror turf. OK, so now Argento has paid his dues to a creative mentor very few young people watching TV will have heard of or even care about. The tragic thing is that could apply to the Argento name too in the 21st Century for his past successes are so truly in the distant past. Lets hope The Third Mother can turn that around because Do You Like Hitchcock? is a mere blip on his body of work radar. (I should point out the print under review was the export subtitled version. In true Italian fashion, and by all eyewitness accounts, the English language dub is atrocious).

reviewed by Alan Jones

credits
cast:	Cristina Brondo, Chiara Conti, Elio Germano, Giuseppe Lo Console, Ivan Morales, Elisabetta Rocchetti
director:	Dario Argento
producer:	Claudio Argento
screenplay:	Dario Argento, Franco Ferrini
cinematography:	Frederic Fasano
music:	Pino Donaggio

technical information
aspect ratio:	1.76:1
format:	digibeta

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